I'm so glad I didn't blog yesterday.
If not, this would've have been a really depressing entry.

When I received my results,
all I could do was stare at my results slip...

& cry. & cry. & cry.

The waterworks just kept on flowing non-stop.
Reality smacked me in the face.
I was devastated. I was lost.
Seriously, I didn't know what to do.

I didn't do well.
Yes, I do qualify for poly but my choices are limited.
All thanks to my Math & Combined Sciences.
Math has never been my forte while Combined Sciences,
I think I did really bad in Chemistry cos I swear I could do Physics.
I guess my hard work wasn't good enough.
But at least I tried my best.

The good thing about my results:
English; b3.
Combined Humans.; c6.
My Malay improved; b3.
Passed POA; c6.

So you can roughly gauge my score huhs.

I'm sorry for not replying some of my texts.
Cos I really didn't know what to say when people asked how I did.
I let people down.
I let myself down.

Yesterday I thought after my results,
I shouldn't be smiling, laughing or be happy anymore.
Cos I don't deserve to. I'll feel guilty.

But now, all the more I should try to be positive.
Look on the brighter side of life; hope for the best.
Then will only good things happen.

Thanks to my friends for being there for me, for encouraging me, for cheering me up.
Seriously, I think I'll be lost without y'all.
It's good to know I'm not alone; I have friends who are with me every step of the way.
From the bottom of my heart,
I love you. (:

to PC & Sheng Long,
seriously, thank you for giving me hope & guiding me through every step of the way.
Now I realised there are many possible opportunities.
I'm sorry I was your headache, PC.
haha x:

Back to results,
I cannot place high hopes through JAE.
But I really hope JPSAE can help me.
I jolly well better have a damn good portfolio & sell myself well.

I don't know why..
I have this feeling that I'll end up in this "particular poly"..
I shouldn't say anything for now. heh.

But seriously, I'll be forever grateful to enter into any poly at all at this point of time.

On a personal note,
I'm sort of having problems at home.
It's affecting my mom. alot.

She doesn't feel home at her own house.
That's all I'm going to say.

I just hope this wouldn't affect my relationship with my kuzzins.
Cos the problem's not with them, it's the parents.
Mostly, that man.

If you want to start a family,
shouldn't you be prepared beforehand for what's to come?
& please, you're a man.
You're supposed to be the sole breadwinner;
support the family.

No offense but I really don't know how you live with yourself.

Ok whatever, no point talking about b.s.
bleh.

My mom's having her make-up test tomorrow.
& she's supposed to be practicing on me now..
but apparently, she just came home & is still yakking away on her phone lol.
anyways, wish her luck! haha.

Oh ya, & since I'm 18,
I'm s'pose to call her by name now.
Lily!~ x)

Hmm..it'll take time for me to get used to it.
haha :P

I guess I'm done for now.
Wish me luck for my JAE & JPSAE alrighty.
I think I really need it.

& who knows,
perhaps this is a blessing in disguise.
we'll see.

take care.
Much Love (:

Added Links: Syakir. PC.
Relinked: Saiful. Nonie.






Guess what? Guess what?
I'm EIGHTEEN baby!
wheeeeeeeeeeee :D

*sings&boogies*
That's da way, uh-huh uh-huh!
I like it, uh-huh uh-huh!

LOL.

Okie, I'll go straight away to details!
heh :D

18 JAN 08

Part I.

My mom was talkin' illogical crap to me lol.
She was sayin'
"Lyana, how to say eh if you're sick then someone wish to be your medicine, be there for you. But you want to say like save it for the next time, in malay..alaa macam in a meaningful way gitu."

somethin' lyke that laa haha.

Then I gave her this weird look.
"Mama, seriously, I don't know what you're tryin' to say. What you mean?! I have no idea what you're talkin' about. I don't know laa..ask me in malay some more. siao."

By then, my phone started ringing already,
texts started comin' in..

"Yeah! terter-terterterter-terterterterterter~"

(Paula Deanda's Easy. LOL.)

& I realised it was midnight already.
I got my first birthday wish!
from...*drumroll*

Ning Zhi :D
oink oink!

I managed to reply her first but replied the others late cos...

SURPRISE!
3 people barged into the room with a birthday cake.
I saw Dian. I saw my brother.
I couldn't see who was behind the cake bcos the face was hidden by the candles haha!
Then I realised it was..

my weiyi, Sabrina!
HAHA :D

I was like,
"Who is that? Sabrina!? What are you doin' here?! It's midnight! I couldn't see your face because of the candles laa can!"

LMAO.


















Pizza! my favourite food :D


May the force be with you.
LOL.






No, I haven't lost my first kiss yet.
& neither has Sabrina... I think.
HAHA!














unwrapping prezzie..


unwrapping prezzie..




still unwrapping prezzie..haha.




voila! Billabong bag :D
(you mst have bgt it at that place I call heaven @ White Sands huhs?
hehe :P)









They sang Happy Birthday to me.
We ate cake, Pizza Hut, camwhored, they interviewed me on video...
oh ya, I also thanked my mom...
For making a fool of herself to distract me haha!
She even asked me to try out 2 dresses when I only wanted to try out the one I was goin' to wear l8er on lol.

After all that then I managed to reply my texts haha.
Sorry for the late replies! heh.

Sabrina got the honour of being the first friend to ever sleepover at my house!
YAY :D

cut ribbon, cut ribbon!
LOL. x)

Part II.

Bday Celebration @ White Tangerine.

Celebrated with Bibi, Ning zhi, Kelly, Agnes, Sabrina & Darrich.
:]

Met up with Bibi & Darrich first @ Mcd.







For those of you who wonder how Darrich is like now...


NAH! haha.

Then met up with the rest @ White Tangerine.
















Darrich & his "pretty girlfriend" haha.


Darling, I laugh with you...


I cry with you..


Darling, I love you! xD


my pretty ah pek, Agnes! :D
7 years of friendship (:






lol!


Spot Darrich! haha.


weiyi :D












I was wondering why they were all wearin' the same top..
birthday stunt or somethin' haha.


Sekali it's bcos I also mst wear!
LOL.

So being a good birthday girl,
I wore it over my dress for awhile lol :P





Then we shifted outside...




dearie :D

















We were sitting, chilling, listenin' to the band playin' songs..
Suddenly after a song, they sang & played Happy Birthday!
I looked around, people were lookin' at me & clappin'.
Then I asked Ning Zhi,
"Are they singing for me?! o.O"

I was so blur laa can haha.

That's when Agnes & Sabrina came out from dunno-where with a birthday cake.
Earlier on they "went to the toilet" lol. :P
But they came out a bit late cos they couldn't light up the candles haha! x)






tryin' to read the birthday cake..haha.


















yummy!









Sabrina & I started creaming each other with cake as if it was lotion lol.
Then being a good birthday girl again,
I let her cream my face lol :P






















I didn't know what was happening behind.
Apparently Sabrina & Kelly were tryin' to distract me haha :P








Then they ask me to do that pig face.
Suddenly Darrich put a TAKA jewelry necklace over my neck.
haha!





If you think I'm crazy..
well, Birds of a feather flock together.
LOL :P












super vision!





19 JAN 08.

NP's Open House/ Red Camp 4 Special Programme.



Red Camp 4 Finale.
I had so much fun!
I'm gonna miss Red Camp 4..
alot.

There was this game whereby we were grouped in our birthday months.
Then we had to complete a no. of tasks.

Some of 'em were:
1. find red spectacles
2. 8 pairs of socks
3. find the Mass Dance song "All For One" in an mp3
3. do a Red Camp 4 cheer.
4. take a candid shot of ourselves.
5. do the Matthew pose.

& I forgot the rest!
haha :P

Jan + April = Janpril!


our candid pose.


the Matthew pose haha.



Since we were the group who completed the most no. of tasks,
we won goodies!
I got Hinder's cd heh.

Then suddenly Matthew annouced it was somebody's birthday yesterday..
I never know hwta react when everyone's attention is on me lol x:
Everyone sang a birthday song to me.
& I got a $100 Lee jeans voucher heh.

Thank you Red Camp 4!
MUACK :D

We also had An Amazing Race.
We had to complete a no. of tasks again haha.

This is where we had to act out a passage..


Shawn pok pok kek!
HAHA xD






The end product lol.
Shawn was s'pose to be a chicken scaring two tourists.
I was s'pose to be a chicken who ate a worm which is Sabrina.
& Sherlyn was s'pose to be Statue of Liberty with a digust look on her face haha x)

The Red Camp 4 Finale skit!
ohmygosh.
I swear it's super duper hilarious.
The ninja's so funny;
this time he can say "ya allah!" & talk malay one.
In da end, he had to take off da shawl cos it was fallin' off lol.

& when they were acting as cheerleaders,
instead of NP's Magnum Force,
they cheered,
"Go Magnum Ice-cream!"

xD










Us XMS/Spartan girls & PC :]


We received a goodie bag!
They also gave us good luck d'Onuts.
I ate 3 & a half donuts can lol. x)



Thank you PC & Sheng Long for being Sabrina's & my personal guide;
accompanying us through the various schools, booths. (:

Ouhh yeah, we also got to join in the last round of the Mass Dance!
:DDDDD


Red Camp 4.
The bestest camp ever.
I'll definitely never forget all the times I had in Red Camp.
I will really miss all the funny skits, the friends I made there,
the SLs..everything.
Also thank you for being a part of my "18th birthday package".
(:

Like Matthew said,
when people ask you
"What camp?"

Remember in our hearts,
"Red Camp 4!"

Aww mann..I'm gonna be suffering from RCWS.
:(

Anyways, here's a vid where you can see snippets of da funny skit they put up.
Also Matthew & Clement singing All Out Of Love by Air Supply.
click!

Red Camp 4 Finale.

Whenever I miss Red Camp 4,
I'll watch this video. (:

Credits: Matthew. Jeremy. Felicia.

20 JAN 08.

Day-out with kuzzins :D

We went bowling @ Marina Square!
My 2nd time bowling heh.
But I only strike once..
people took all da light balls bleh.
:P













After that we went to the Esplanade & chilled.
:]













































Lastly, we went back to Marina Square & danced!
yepp, luckily there weren't much people around haha.
I really enjoyed spending time with them.
I had lotsa fun (:


I didn't know y'all would take it literally when I said I have expensive taste haha. x:
but seriously, thank you for da gifts! :D


I love cards;
personalised gifts filled with words from the heart. (:

& that is how I celebrated my 18th birthday.
With the people I love & the people who love me (:

Thanks to everyone who wished me.
Thank you for remembering & I really appreciate it alot.
I love y'all :D

To Sabrina, Ning Zhi, Bibi, Kelly & Agnes,
I'm so glad that I got to celebrate my birthday with you girls.
You girls mean alot to me; my closest group of friends.
Thanks for putting so much effort in planning the surprises heh.
I love y'all! muack muack muack :D

To Darrich,
everytime you come back to SG,
just nice you're just it time to celebrate my birthday haha!
Thanks alot dude ;D

My 18th birthday is no doubt,
my best birthday ever.
:]

I have a story to share with y'all.
An email Sabrina forwarded to me.
Read it first..

Sand and Stone.

TWO FRIENDS WERE WALKING
THROUGH THE DESERT.
DURING SOME POINT OF THE
JOURNEY, THEY HAD AN
ARGUMENT; AND ONE FRIEND
SLAPPED THE OTHER ONE
IN THE FACE.
THE ONE WHO GOT SLAPPED
WAS HURT, BUT WITHOUT
SAYING ANYTHING,
WROTE IN THE SAND:

TODAY MY BEST FRIEND
SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE.

THEY KEPT ON WALKING,
UNTIL THEY FOUND AN OASIS,
WHERE THEY DECIDED
TO TAKE A BATH

THE ONE WHO HAD BEEN
SLAPPED GOT STUCK IN THE
MIRE AND STARTED DROWNING,
BUT THE FRIEND SAVED HIM.

AFTER HE RECOVERED FROM
THE NEAR DROWNING,
HE WROTE ON A STONE:

'TODAY MY BEST FRIEND
SAVED MY LIFE '.

THE FRIEND WHO HAD SLAPPED
AND SAVED HIS BEST FRIEND
ASKED HIM, 'AFTER I HURT YOU,
YOU WROTE IN THE SAND AND NOW,
YOU WRITE ON A STONE, WHY?'

THE FRIEND REPLIED
'WHEN SOMEONE HURTS US
WE SHOULD WRITE IT DOWN
IN SAND, WHERE WINDS OF
FORGIVENESS CAN ERASE IT AWAY.
BUT, WHEN SOMEONE DOES
SOMETHING GOOD FOR US,
WE MUST ENGRAVE IT IN STONE
WHERE NO WIND
CAN EVER ERASE IT.'

LEARN TO WRITE
YOUR HURTS IN
THE SAND AND TO
CARVE YOUR
BENEFITS IN STONE.

THEY SAY IT TAKES A
MINUTE TO FIND A SPECIAL
PERSON, AN HOUR TO
APPRECIATE THEM, A DAY
TO LOVE THEM, BUT THEN
AN ENTIRE LIFE
TO FORGET THEM.

SEND THIS PHRASE TO
THE PEOPLE YOU'LL NEVER
FORGET. I JUST DID.

IF YOU DON'T
SEND IT TO ANYONE,
IT MEANS YOU'RE IN A
HURRY AND THAT YOU'VE
FORGOTTEN YOUR FRIENDS.
TAKE THE TIME TO LIVE!

DO NOT VALUE THE THINGS
YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE, BUT VALUE
WHO YOU HAVE IN YOUR LIFE !

AND IF I HAPPEN TO GET IT BACK,
THEN I KNOW MY PLACE IN YOUR LIFE.

This email made me realised somethin'.
It also made me spill out somethin' I've bottled up for a long time to my mom..
I finally told someone about it.

I miss somebody.
I don't want to hold a grudge on anyone.
I don't want to regret anything, keep somebody in the dark.
I don't want to move on with my life with a heavy heart;
knowing I left a special person behind.

A person who made me smile, made me really happy.
A person who I once could turn to for absolutely anything.
A person I texted whenever I was bored.
A person I shared my moments of happiness & sadness with.
A person who was always there for me.
We went through alot together.
I don't want to spent the rest of my life without somebody I can never forget.
& I hope he feels the same way too.

When you were the third person to wish me Happy Birthday,
I was happy.
I really appreciate it that you wished me even when we weren't on talking terms.
You still remember me, you still care.
& I realised I didn't want to communicate with you just like that; with just a reply.
Wait till your birthday comes which is in September & I wish you instead.
Why wait when when we can still make this work?

You hurt me. I hurt you.
We both made mistakes.
That only proves we're human.
Just like the story,
I want to learn to forgive & forget.

Now, my memory of you is not about the thing that broke up our friendship.
All I remember now is about how we enjoyed each other's company;
how you were a great best friend to me.
I don't want you to be just a memory,
I still want you as my best friend.
& I really hope you do too.

Please gimme a call or text me if you do.
(:

O Level Results!

tomorrow, 2pm.
Oh my, I really hope for the best.
I really hope I score well.
I guess now y'all can roughly guess what my birthday cake wishes are huhs.
I hope my birthday wish comes true tomorrow.
& I hope I won't be a nervous wreck tmr. bleh. :P

I'll leave you with lyrics from my new blog song.
Dedicated to my loved ones (:

take care people.
wish me luck tmr!
much love.
don't forget to remember me heh :]

The Heart Never Lies
by McFly.

Some people laugh, some people cry
Some people live, some people die
Some people run, right into the fire
Some people hide their every desire
But we are the lovers

If you don't believe me
Then just look into my eyes
'cause the heart never lies

Some people fight, some people fall
Others pretend they don't care at all
If you wanna fight I'll stand right beside you
The day that you fall I'll be right behind you
To pick up the pieces

If you don't believe me
Just look into my eyes
'cause the heart never lies

Another year over, and we're still together
It's not always easy, but I'm here forever

Yeah we are the lovers, I know you believe me
When you look into my eyes
'cause the heart never lies

'cause the heart never lies

Because the heart never lies.