Black Locket

I'm so glad I didn't blog yesterday.
If not, this would've have been a really depressing entry.

When I received my results,
all I could do was stare at my results slip...

& cry. & cry. & cry.

The waterworks just kept on flowing non-stop.
Reality smacked me in the face.
I was devastated. I was lost.
Seriously, I didn't know what to do.

I didn't do well.
Yes, I do qualify for poly but my choices are limited.
All thanks to my Math & Combined Sciences.
Math has never been my forte while Combined Sciences,
I think I did really bad in Chemistry cos I swear I could do Physics.
I guess my hard work wasn't good enough.
But at least I tried my best.

The good thing about my results:
English; b3.
Combined Humans.; c6.
My Malay improved; b3.
Passed POA; c6.

So you can roughly gauge my score huhs.

I'm sorry for not replying some of my texts.
Cos I really didn't know what to say when people asked how I did.
I let people down.
I let myself down.

Yesterday I thought after my results,
I shouldn't be smiling, laughing or be happy anymore.
Cos I don't deserve to. I'll feel guilty.

But now, all the more I should try to be positive.
Look on the brighter side of life; hope for the best.
Then will only good things happen.

Thanks to my friends for being there for me, for encouraging me, for cheering me up.
Seriously, I think I'll be lost without y'all.
It's good to know I'm not alone; I have friends who are with me every step of the way.
From the bottom of my heart,
I love you. (:

to PC & Sheng Long,
seriously, thank you for giving me hope & guiding me through every step of the way.
Now I realised there are many possible opportunities.
I'm sorry I was your headache, PC.
haha x:

Back to results,
I cannot place high hopes through JAE.
But I really hope JPSAE can help me.
I jolly well better have a damn good portfolio & sell myself well.

I don't know why..
I have this feeling that I'll end up in this "particular poly"..
I shouldn't say anything for now. heh.

But seriously, I'll be forever grateful to enter into any poly at all at this point of time.

On a personal note,
I'm sort of having problems at home.
It's affecting my mom. alot.

She doesn't feel home at her own house.
That's all I'm going to say.

I just hope this wouldn't affect my relationship with my kuzzins.
Cos the problem's not with them, it's the parents.
Mostly, that man.

If you want to start a family,
shouldn't you be prepared beforehand for what's to come?
& please, you're a man.
You're supposed to be the sole breadwinner;
support the family.

No offense but I really don't know how you live with yourself.

Ok whatever, no point talking about b.s.
bleh.

My mom's having her make-up test tomorrow.
& she's supposed to be practicing on me now..
but apparently, she just came home & is still yakking away on her phone lol.
anyways, wish her luck! haha.

Oh ya, & since I'm 18,
I'm s'pose to call her by name now.
Lily!~ x)

Hmm..it'll take time for me to get used to it.
haha :P

I guess I'm done for now.
Wish me luck for my JAE & JPSAE alrighty.
I think I really need it.

& who knows,
perhaps this is a blessing in disguise.
we'll see.

take care.
Much Love (: