What Hurts The Most?

What hurts more?
Not having something everytime but when you finally do, it is all yours. Just for you.
Or having something most of the time, so close within your grasp but it is not entirely, completely all yours?

They say the worst way to miss someone is to have them sitting right next to you and yet you know you can never have them.
In my case, I have someone...but not to myself.

This week has been tough on me relationship wise...or you could say this holidays.
Ever since we've been having practices, I don't get to have Q.T. with my boyfriend as much as I want to.
Sure, we see each other, go to school together for practices if I have 'em too & all...but it's not the same as spending Q.T. with each other, just the two of us.
Even if we're together on bus rides mostly the talk nowadays is about work which drains us.
Heck, practices already drains us what else talks about it.

That's why it's possible to be with someone most of the time yet you miss him so much because you never got to really spend precious quality time with him alone.
It hurts so much to miss someone so bad. It really hurts.

Among many things that you are to me, I miss you as my boyfriend the most.
I miss my boyfriend. I miss you. I miss us. ♥